The Struggle

The Struggle



I was reminded recently of a difficulty that we all face in our pursuit to raise our children. We have been given these wonderfully unique little humans who start life trusting us completely. It doesn't matter what stage of life we find ourselves in when we first become parents. They aren't aware of our pre-existing struggles when they come into our lives and they may never understand the toil we put ourselves through to raise them.

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Regardless of our station, age, or natural biological relationship to these little humans, we can all relate to our innate desire to do right by them. We can all relate to feeling overwhelmed, un-qualified, angry, and emotionally or physically insufficient for the task. We have to choose every day to put aside our struggles for their struggles. Britt and I often struggle to communicate where we are emotional to each other or if we do communicate it's often done in the wrong way.
 Most of my parenting life has been done while also working for the railroad. I worked myself to complete exhaustion regularly and early on it became apparent that rest wasn't going to be an option when I got home.  When I got home, I needed to be present and help give my wife a break and spend time with my kids. I struggled with this at first because the lengths of exhaustion I was pushing were excessive so it made sense that I had earned a break. God gave me a wonderful partner who is always diligent and who also pushed herself to exhaustion. We often argued about our struggles but it took years of struggling before we started to begin to understand each other. It was hard for me to see her struggle because I was regularly distracted by my own. We can't let struggle be a justification to not show love and grace, we get caught up in a loop of pursuing our kids and our sanity but neglect to realize or care that all of us are in this same struggle.
Husbands, we need to love our wives and affirm their struggle. They have a chemical bond with our children that we will never truly experience ourselves. With that bond, they will always feel not good enough, even when they're exhibiting and producing the most beautiful characteristics in our children. They will doubt themselves even while doing an amazing job because nothing will ever be good enough for their babies. Their struggles need to be acknowledged daily regardless of our struggles.
Wives and their husbands spend themselves for you and your family. We spend all of our energy trying to lead, resolve problems and provide. We will always feel responsible, even when we don't show it. Our family's struggles are our greatest pursuits and we will always take them as our own. Wives your husbands need you to acknowledge their struggles. Not everyone has a spouse, these individuals especially need acknowledgment of their truly remarkable struggles. We all need to get better at acknowledging these shared struggles. We all need each other's grace because these struggles are isolating when we don't get regular affirmations about them. We all struggle in this wild faith journey, so please encourage each other,  we all need that! 
Ecclesiastes 2:24-25 NIV
24 A person can do nothing better than to eat and drink and find satisfaction in their toil. This too, I see, is from the hand of God, 25 for without him, who can eat or find enjoyment?
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1 comment

So very well said Jacob life is not easy it’s a road with lots of bumps and curves and have to learn how to navigate it and you and Brittny have co.e a long, long way and we are so very proud of both of you❤❤


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