Home School Mom

Home School Mom

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     My wife and I were pretty young when we had discovered Britt had become pregnant with our first child. At 19 and 21 we were passionate but had very little clue what we had just gotten ourselves into!

     We were kids and we had chosen to get married just 6 months after meeting! Britt had become pregnant just two months later. It was overwhelming and honestly a recipe for disaster. However, God had a plan for us which is why it worked. Our belief and understanding in His hand over our lives has been proven time and time again. One of these defining moments in our life, that was made so clear to us has been in regards to how God brought us to the decision to home school our children.

     Halfway through her third trimester Britt brought up to me the desire of hers, to home school our daughter. It had caught me off guard because she had brought it up right as I was getting home from work. Deciding how we were going to educate our unborn child was was not even on my radar! Our child hadn’t been born yet and was still years from school! I assumed right off that this was just another part of “nesting” for Britt and that it didn’t matter what was decided now. We could discuss it later on when we were closer to that step.

     I was very green in marriage and hadn’t grasped the importance of paying attention to my wife’s true heart. At that time in my life, I was too much of a “new guy” to know how to start doing that.  This was unfair to her of course, but would later be a moment of clarity for me. I am reminded of that whenever I look back at these early years. At the moment however, I was too proud and stupidly told her that “we could talk later about it when it was more relevant”.  She immediately responded “I am homeschooling my child, there is nothing to discuss!”.  This frustrated me and my pride was hurt. It felt like she wasn't giving me a say in our child’s schooling and it felt unfair. I actually had very strong opinions on the subject of home school. An argument ensued that would become a framework for later arguments that we would have on this subject until Hallie, our daughter became school age.

     One  night I came home from a long night shift of building trains in Roseville and the traffic was terrible!  I was excited to get home to my girls. They were my safe space and my comfort. I walked through the door and scooped up my little girl and gave her a snuggle and then gave Britt a kiss. Britt looked at me and said “we need to sign Hallie up for home school”.

     We had argued about this decision for some time now and I didn’t want to get right into an argument. Britt had been steadfast and unflinching with her desire and decision to home school Hallie. She had done countless hours of research and had picked out the programs and curriculum to use. I wasn’t opposed to the idea of homeschooling. I was upset that she had made it clear that she was going to do it regardless of my feelings. I personally had struggled heavily in school as a result of ADD, which wasn’t very well understood throughout my childhood.  I had been moved in and out of six different schools in two different states because of my academic struggles and anger problems. My mom had attempted to home school me on two separate occasions but it had been even more difficult for me than conventional school!

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     My base of knowledge with home schooling had come from my experiences in the two programs that I had been enrolled in. Both had the same issues of poor socialization for kids and seemingly out of date curriculum. As a result of my difficulty learning, I often found myself in even more trouble at home and with more consequences than I would have if I were going to a brick-and-mortar school. I didn’t want my little girl to experience those things!

     After all of the many discussions we had, since the first time home school had been brought up Britt had become very aware of my insecurities. She had her own difficult experiences in school as well. She had struggled with school early on but had ended up in a program that taught the way she needed to learn. It opened up endless possibilities for her! Regardless of her experiences or mine the time had now come and we had to settle this choice.

     She looked at me and expressed how passionately she felt that this was from God.  Her words Instantly, in that moment sealed the deal for me! No matter what happened, I knew in that moment it was God who also wanted this for my child and I had instant peace about it.

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     God put this desire in my wife’s heart and she immediately expressed it from the moment she felt it. Why didn’t he make it clear to me right away? I believe  Its because my heart had already been hardened towards that topic. Instead, God provided me the opportunity to start working through the idea years before my daughter would even enter school. Britt didn’t let my opinions or pride deter her from researching and working hard to put my daughter’s future and foundation at the top of her priorities.  Its so clear in hindsight God’s hand in all of this and also my wife’s faith throughout!

     Her faith is still at work today with my daughter and now my son and I am so grateful for it! Her hard work and perseverance have benefited the whole family! It has in drawn us closer together. Her daily pursuit to educate our children is wonderful to witness and is by far the healthiest for the kids. She is able to uniquely adapt the daily tasks, curriculum and workload specific to each child’s needs. It’s inspired me to take a more active role with their education, which is important!

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     Every parent should take the responsibility to know how our children are doing in school. Homeschooling takes that belief to the next level. When you take on homeschooling your kids, you become a direct link to their success or failure. The buck stops with you, no one else is to blame when your homeschooling. This can be intimidating and is an extraordinary challenge. My wife owns this challenge and lives it out daily. Is it scary? Yup! Does she let that stop her? Nope! She holds herself accountable and reminds me to do the same in everything I pursue. Her confidence in Gods calling has directly correlated to creating our family’s identity of self-reliance and faith in God’s hand over all of us. When God made my wife, he made a home school mom!

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